"love lies in jealousy"

from here on out i'm making a pact with myself to stop lurking!!
i do nothing but drive myself insane.
so, no more.

also, something is wrong with me!
i'm always extremely exhausted.
i think i need an entire day of sleep to feel back on track.
i also need someone to come massage my back everyday,
i feel like such an old lady.

i'm eliminating people from my life.
if you cause drama and you're not bringing anything positive in my life,
you're out.
i'm tired of ridiculous bullshit for no damn reason.

shawna, kayla and i watched "he's just not that into you" last night.
at first it depressed the fuck out of me, because i just want someone to love me forever.
but then i finally realized, i'm never going to give up hope.
one day it will happen and i'll live happily ever after.
and i will not allow anyone to make me think otherwise.

p.s. EXACTLY ONE MONTH FROM TODAY I WILL BE 21!!!!!