"i'll pretend my ships not sinking"

i don't even know how to describe what i feel right now.
my body aches, my stomach is in knots, my heart is on fire, my eyes are heavy.
and i've brought this all upon myself.
i do nothing but put myself in situations that bring me down.

i've come to realize i am the fun girl.
i'm the girl you want to hang out with and "have a good time" with.
you wanna sleep with me and party with me.
but you cant see yourself being with me forever.
and i don't know what i do to stop being that girl.

i'm interested.
i'm trying to show it.
but i'm so fucked up in the head from everything, i have no idea what to do with myself.
somebody fix me.